How an album of existential dread helped me understand my own self worth.

In the spring of early 2020, everything seemed so simple. I was doing well in school, I had just finished my online driver's education, and I was looking forward to the new Megan thee Stallion album. Yet when March 13th came upon us shit hit the fan real quick. It felt as if I was in a crappy horror movie. I was expecting the worst but a 10-month quarantine isn't as bad as a zombie apocalypse I guess. As the world seemed to crumble, we had to retreat to our homes, and I had time to myself for the first time in months- a blessing disguised as a hot turd made a sudden change in my life. After weeks or sometimes months of little to no interaction with the people who were in my life on a daily, I made the realization of how they affected me, even if they didn't know they were doing this subconsciously or consciously I couldn't take the constant draining of my emotions and energy. I had to cut off friends I've known for years, people who I even called my best friends. It felt as if I had to do all the work like I was pushing the dumpster fire of a relationship and every time I tried to distant myself I would be insulted or straight up manipulated to keep on pushing. I couldn't take the constant berating so I did what I had to do for the sake of my being and honestly music helped me both do the deed of cutting them off and getting over the emotional turmoil.

One of the albums that honestly changed my quarantine and perception of what life can be is Time' n' Place by Kero Kero Bonito. A British electro-pop band based in London known for their mix of synths, glitchy beats, and the combination of Japanese and English lyrics. Time' n' Place was a sharp turn in KKB's discography departing from the giddy and joyful electronic inspired J-pop to an almost lo-fi grunge dance-pop.